Why Can’t I Just Stop Stressing?
Stress often gets a bad reputation as many of us approach it as something to eliminate or avoid. However, stress itself is not inherently bad and can actually serve a helpful purpose. It can energize us, increase our attention, and mobilize our bodies to respond to challenges, protect ourselves, and take action with things we care about. The problem can arise when the stress response gets activated but never gets the opportunity to fully resolve. Stressors can layer on top of each other, and we can feel stuck, overwhelmed, and burnt out. This is where understanding the stress cycle can help!
The Stress Cycle: What It Is
The stress cycle conceptualizes our experience of navigating a stressor. A stressor is a situation that stirs up the emotional and physiological experience of stress. Once a perceived threat arises, your nervous system is activated to react and protect. As the stressful event is managed, the heightened state can still persist. In order to release the build up of stress, you can be intentional in creating a sense of safety for your body to stabilize. That final step allows for the completion of the stress cycle. Instead of trying to shut down the natural response to a stressor, you let the stress run its course.
Incomplete Stress Cycle
Sometimes, it can be hard to know if you have completed the stress cycle. We can get caught up in the busyness of life and move straight into the next thing without realizing that the previous stressor has ended. That pattern of letting stressors accumulate without opportunities for recovery can become so exhausting.
Our bodies can have a hard time differentiating between a life-threatening experience and a less physically dangerous one, and we might react in similar ways across a variety of circumstances. It is important to be curious towards yourself and your context. Reflect on what is happening and what your body’s response is telling you, so you can recognize the level of safety and identify helpful ways to regulate. Some impacts and indicators of an incomplete stress cycle include:
Feeling on edge, tense, or alert
Trouble sleeping
Irritability or emotional overwhelm
Numbness, shut down, disconnection
Difficulty relaxing or focusing
Racing thoughts, constant worry
Physiological symptoms (chronic pain, tight chest)
Feeling stuck in survival mode
Completing The Stress Cycle
It can also be challenging to navigate an ongoing stressor. Dealing with your stress response is not always the same thing as dealing with the thing causing your stress. Some stressors persist, and open stress loops exist.
Even if the source is still present, you can give your body opportunities to move through the stress response and return to a greater sense of safety. The way to navigate this is creating small moments, day-to-day, to move the stress out of your body and push against the build up of overwhelm.
A few ways to communicate safety to your body and complete individual stress cycles include:
Physical Movement - Walk, run, dance, stretch, swim, whatever feels good for your body to move through energy.
Deep Breathing - Take slow, long breaths to activate the calming nervous system.
Social Connection - Share a long hug or talk with a loved one. Spend time with people, pets, community.
Emotional Expression - Let your body release built up tension through a deep belly laugh, a good cry, journaling, etc.
Creative Activity - Make something to process your feelings or have fun. Engage in art, music, writing, etc.
Mindfulness - Orient to the present moment through your five senses and recognize current safety.
Rest and Relaxation - Give yourself permission to sleep, slow down, and recover. Engage in muscle relaxation by tensing and releasing muscles.
Completing the stress cycle isn’t about fixing everything. It’s simply about giving your body a chance to catch up with what your mind already knows. Take the pressure off of doing self-care perfectly, and instead focus on what helps your body feel safer and more settled through life’s ups and downs.
References:
Additional Resources:
Therapy For Corporate Burnout
Just Add Water: Stress Management https://www.thecouchtherapy.org/post/just-add-water-stress-management
Winter Self-Care
Your Guide To Self-Care - Burnout Workbook https://www.thecouchtherapy.org/post/your-guide-to-self-care-a-burnout-workbook-that-actually-helps
Click This Link To Learn More About Our Burnout and Self-Care Guide https://www.thecouchtherapy.org/product-page/burnout-and-self-care-guide-general or watch our Reel for more information: https://www.facebook.com/reel/720441970326559?fs=e&mibextid=wwXIfr&rdid=OR7gG70CnVRRlD0V&share_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fshare%2Fr%2F1FMoNKXsPx%2F%3Fmibextid%3DwwXIfr#
With Love,
Moira Moran, LPC-Associate Supervised By Emily Morehead
Interested in learning more about Moira? Click this link to head to her bio: https://www.thecouchtherapy.org/product-page/moira-moran
Our therapists see clients in person in McKinney and Colleyville, Texas, and online throughout Texas, Arkansas, Oklahoma, Louisiana, Alabama, and Michigan. Find your therapist or take our matching quiz to get started, and schedule a free 15-minute consultation.
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